Going through a tough time? Try 'lemonading' and use these 30 ideas to add playfulness to your life
Resilience loves a playfellow. Literally. So when the going gets tough, try to make lemonade.
Being an adult comes with a never-ending list of serious obligations. Bills, work, responsibilities — who has time for play? But according to new research, a playful approach to life isn’t just fun — it can help you bounce back from stress with more resilience.
The study, led by Dr. Xiangyou ‘Sharon’ Shen of Oregon State University and her team, discovered a powerful connection between playfulness and resilience, a concept they’ve dubbed lemonading. Their study, conducted in February 2021 during the second wave of COVID-19 and the early days of vaccine rollout, surveyed 503 adults. Researchers assessed participants’ level of playfulness by analyzing their self-reported inclinations toward spontaneity and enjoyment.
In an interview with Yahoo, Shen explained, "We found playful people reported the same levels of vulnerability and isolation as their less playful peers, yet they engaged in significantly more resilient coping behaviors and found ways to maintain quality experiences. It's like they had an extra gear for adaptability — they weren't dismissing the difficulties of the pandemic, but they were remarkably adept at finding ways to thrive within its limitations."
In other words, playful people aren’t immune to stress but can adapt and find joy even in tough situations. Shen and her team coined the term "lemonading," defining it as "the ability to imagine and generate positive experiences even in difficult circumstances." So, how exactly does playfulness fuel resilience, and what can we learn from those who embrace it? Continue reading to learn more.
Why is developing resilience important?
Resiliency is how well a person handles and recovers from change and difficulties — a critical trait as you move through life. "Resilient adults are less easily triggered by life's ups and downs. They are able to remain more balanced and emotionally regulated, which in turn impacts their relationships and interactions with others," says Lisa Greenstein, LCSW, certified EMDR therapist, and certified perinatal health clinician at Lisa Greenstein Therapy and Consulting. She adds that more resilient adults typically have higher self-efficacy and self-esteem, feeling more ready to resolve setbacks and problems.
So, how does playfulness factor into this? "One powerful way to build resilience is by seeking out moments of joy — whether big or small — and intentionally integrating them into our daily lives," shares Ajna Glisic, LMFT, a therapist and a mental health program coordinator for Sacramento County in California, helping to run the Stop Stigma Sacramento project. "Playfulness is an essential part of self-care, which is integral to developing resilience. Playfulness looks different for everyone, but one constant is that playfulness brings us joy."
How to add playfulness to your life
If researchers say taking time for playfulness makes life easier to manage, why not try it out? It's a lot more fun than just sitting around at home. But this doesn't mean you have to act like a child. "Playfulness in adults doesn't necessarily look the same as it does in kids," says Gabrielle Wanchek, LMFT, a licensed therapist with Mindpath Health. "When we think about playfulness in adults, we're talking about the ability to be lighthearted, willing to laugh, have spontaneity, [be] curious and even silly." It's all about intentionally pursuing fun, positive moments in your life.
According to Wanchek, this shift can be as simple as getting a new drink at your local coffee shop or as involved as developing a whole new hobby.
Greenstein also notes that playfulness and resilience often go hand in hand for adult survivors of childhood trauma — whether that was abuse, acting as the parent or taking care of younger siblings. "If their inner child did not get to be free and playful and innocent, healing can take place by giving the inner child what it needs later in life," she says.
If you're interested in adding playfulness to your routine, here are some suggestions for bringing play into your life. You could try one a day for the next month (if you're especially motivated) or simply pick and choose what feels right.
1. Have a movie night
Start simple with some cozy blankets, a bowl of popcorn and a good movie. Watch something fun that will bring you joy and invite loved ones to join you. We suggest classics like Dumb & Dumber or Clueless.
2. Be a kid in a candy store
Treat yourself to a selection of candies in a full-blown candy store. It will be just like when you were a kid, but there’s no one there to limit your sour worm haul.
3. Do karaoke
Yes, in the wrong setting, karaoke can be stressful or overwhelming. But with just a few good friends and a solid karaoke machine, it can be the perfect way to spend a Saturday night. The only requirement: at least one rendition of Mr. Brightside.
BEILIHART
This affordable karaoke machine comes with two microphones and party lights.
4. Pick up some new jokes
Whether someone's having a good day or a bad one, they'll likely appreciate a new joke. Learn some hilarious ones from a joke book, or come up with your own if you love a challenge, and spread the laughter by sharing them with your friends.
5. Learn to hula hoop
It’s crazy how much joy a circle of plastic can provide. But learning to hula-hoop will inevitably bring out your inner child — and some stress-reducing movement to your body.
This hula hoop is weighted and can be used for fun or to work up a sweat.
6. Do an animal yoga class
It seems like there’s a yoga class for every animal now. Try one with puppies, kittens, goats or whatever's available in your neck of the woods. You’ll get the benefits of movement with the joy of looking at and interacting with cute animals.
7. Play Cards Against Humanity
Really let out your silly (and maybe a bit raunchy) side with a game of Cards Against Humanity. Go for extra fun by picking one of their specialized decks or expansion packs and challenge yourself to be as over the top as you can be.
Cards Against Humanity LLC.
This card game may be for "horrible people," but playing it won't be so horrible if it brings extra laughter to your life.
8. Decorate baked goods
There is something so satisfying about baking a treat and then decorating it, as if you were in third grade again. Choose your sweet — cookies, cupcakes or whatever you wish — and get out all the colored frosting and sprinkles to make a fun dessert.
9. Wear funky clothing
Try on that vest that always feels too wild for a Wednesday. Take that over-the-top skirt out for a night with friends. Wear something that makes you feel happy and free.
10. Draw a picture
As an adult, it can feel like everything you create has to be amazing. Instead, let yourself draw just for the fun of it, without the need to create something in the end.
Sure, you can start with a pencil and sketchbook, but if you want to start drawing as a regular act of playfulness, consider grabbing a set of charcoal sticks to add shading and perspective to your drawings.
11. Take a dance class
No, not one where you have to hit each step perfectly. Find one that allows for some improvisation — or just find a bar with a really good dance floor and do it yourself.
12. Play with clay
Clay is the ultimate creative medium —it lets you experiment freely, knowing you can always start over. Enjoy the texture in your hands as you shape anything your imagination inspires, using any color of clay you like. For a lasting creation, try air-drying clay, which hardens over time and can be painted once dry.
13. Go on bike rides
Biking doesn't have to be reserved for commutes or serious training. Get yourself a bike (something straightforward or decked out with a basket and all) to bike around your local park or neighborhood. You can even take it to countryside paths with a solid bike rack for your car.
This beach-style cruiser is ideal for casual rides around the park.
14. Attend a comedy show
Allow yourself to sit back and just laugh the night away. Comedy shows are a great option when you want to relax and enjoy yourself without having to contribute any energy. And if you don't feel like going out? Check out the standup comedy shows on Netflix.
15. Try improv
If you're feeling particularly brave, attempt to take the stage yourself. Try an improv class to "yes, and" your way to a more playful mindset.
16. Throw darts at paint balloons
Let’s be honest, everyone has not-so-secretly wanted to do this since watching The Princess Diaries in 2001. So, why not go for it? Fill some balloons with paint, tie them up and get to throwing some darts. Just keep in mind you're probably going to need a funnel to fill the balloons if you don't want to make a giant mess before you even get started.
17. Make your own pizza
Haven't you ever wanted to throw some pizza dough in the air and catch it just because you can? Pick up one of our favorite pizza ovens and get to baking your own pie at home — the topping limit does not exist if you're doing it yourself.
Gyreuni
If you're not ready to buy a pizza oven for your homemade pies, these pizza-making accessories will get you off to a good start.
18. Go to a concert
Let your body and mind relax while listening to some of your favorite music. Dance the night away at a concert with friends or solo in a crowd of other music lovers.
19. Get out your favorite board game
It doesn't matter if it's Sorry!, Risk or Chutes and Ladders, just channel your inner child and challenge your friends to a competition-filled game night. Allow yourself to take it as seriously as you want, as long as you enjoy yourself.
Hasbro Gaming
If the dice rolls to "L," don't forget that "lemonading" is a legitimate answer!
20. Do a paint-and-sip class
Paint-and-sip classes are a great opportunity to relax with your friends and let your imagination take over. Plus, you have an instructor to help take the guesswork out of the process and wine to help ease any inhibitions.
21. Speak in an accent all day
It's hard to take life too seriously when you're speaking in an accent all day (or even just a few minutes). It can be something completely made up or something silly, like a pirate accent — who can keep from smiling when they shout out a good, "Ahoy, matey! Shiver me timbers"?
22. Play Twister
Another good game from childhood? Twister. You can't help but feel playful when trying to accomplish right foot green while your left hand is on red.
Hasbro Gaming
This is an especially fun idea if you have kids at home who have never played the game.
23. Peruse vintage shops for wild finds
Grab a friend and head out for a day of digging through vintage clothing and home goods at your local secondhand shops. Make it a game by seeing who can find the wildest item of the day. You're certain to discover a few off-the-wall items, but you just might come away with a few gems for your home, too.
24. Visit a theme park
It's hard not to feel a bit more lighthearted while you're in an amusement park. You might spend all day on roller-coasters or riding through the lazy river at a waterpark. Either way, enjoy the carefree atmosphere and a few thrills, too.
25. Try roller skating
Yes, you might not have gone roller skating since you were a kid, but it's like riding a bike ... well, kind of. Go to a roller rink or your local park and just skate around for a while. Plus, it's a great excuse to buy cute roller skates.
If you're buying a pair of skates, you really should pick an eye-catching color that's guaranteed to make you smile.
26. Write a story
No, this is not a story you're trying to make perfect for submission. Write a story that follows any instincts you have in the moment and gets as ridiculous as you want. The point is to just let your mind create without restrictions.
27. Play lighthearted video games
Get into some serious video game play, whether it's a racing game against your partner or a multiplayer adventure game with your best friend.
28. Get a fun manicure
You know those intricate stencils or three-dimensional elements you always see online? Why not do something over-the-top, or even multicolored, to add a little joy to your life? You don't even have to hit the salon — there are lots of DIY press-on nail kits that make it easy to amp up your nails at home.
BAOYAALIN
Get this green swirl manicure in just a few minutes, with press-on options that won't damage your natural nails.
29. Read a graphic novel
You may be a big reader, but have you dipped your toe in the graphic novel pool yet? Explore the fun of reading and seeing a story come to life with beloved titles like Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic by Alison Bechdel.
30. Go to a museum
Let your inner curiosity blossom by heading to a local museum exhibition. Wander the rooms as you soak in the art or history, taking in how inventive and creative humans can be.
Meet the experts
Ajna Glisic, LMFT, a therapist and a mental health program coordinator for Sacramento County, helping to run the Stop Stigma Sacramento project
Lisa Greenstein, LCSW, certified EMDR therapist and certified perinatal health clinician at Lisa Greenstein Therapy and Consulting
Xiangyou ‘Sharon’ Shen, Ph.D., assistant professor at Oregon State University
Gabrielle Wanchek, LMFT, licensed therapist with Mindpath Health
Our health content is for informational purposes only and is not intended as professional medical advice. Consult a medical professional on questions about your health.