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I’m a 1st year undergrad in material sciences and engineering.

I was sort of herded into joining a professor's lab after accidentally pointing out a mistake in his lecture. 2 months later he gave me some papers to study (fluid and a bit of thermo) saying this was very shallow in depth, very easy. 2 weeks later got called in for a meeting and ended up getting chewed out for half an hour because I could barely answer his opening question, "Explain this paper to me." While I promised to bring better results next time, his disappointment was just too obvious and unyielding.

It's a struggle to keep up along with class and exams. These don't help anyways because it's way below the papers' level. I do want to do well in this lab. The papers are interesting, research itself is an intriguing process. Even imagining having a career in this area. But I just don't know whether I'm stupid or if he has unrealistic expectations for a freshman. If he was straight out mean or angry, I would be saying adios. But it's pure disappointment and the frustration of "why can't you complete this easy task?"

Along with that I was planning to take a 2nd year engineering math course during the winter break, slightly earlier than the curriculum. But now have to choose between preparing for that or focusing on research.

While I was considering to ask him if I could take it easy until the first half of winter break to focus on my own studies, it feels like it would be pushing it way too far. He mentioned wanting me to write a paper on the topic during the break. I'm speculating he meant one at an undergrad journal level or something. Dude is nice but intimidating as hell. Kept talking about my "future" graduate program.

I’m really not sure how to navigate this. The choice seems to be between giving up on my personal interests (mathematics) to keep my place in this lab or asking the professor about cutting me some slack for the current semester (which I’m afraid may be a foolish offense).

Might be some relevant info - I dropped out of high school thinking academia was not my thing and worked menial jobs for a couple years. So far in college, the main theme was learning how to study. A lot of improvements have been made, but still have some way to go. During the process I found a genuine interest towards mathematics. I’m not sure it will be wise to share personal info like these - it doesn’t feel like it would build rapport with this professor. He comes off as either way too smart or just has been too long since he himself was an undergrad to understand these miscellaneous struggles. It’s a running joke in the lab that he’s some elite government undercover agent, which explains why he ended up in this mid-tier school.

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    Is the prof actually aware you are a first year undergraduate student? If you had a few jobs inbetween, are you older than your peers? Commented Oct 26 at 11:45
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    I am older, but not by much. Early 20s. The professor is aware as well - it was being in his freshman lectures that led to joining the lab. He sometimes starts by saying "I know you are young, but... ((this is for your own benefit))" Commented Oct 26 at 12:21
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    Can you write a more descriptive title, giving some indication of what "this" is? Commented Oct 26 at 21:43
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    Out of curiosity how does ‘accidentally pointing out a mistake in his lecture’ occur? Commented Oct 26 at 23:09
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    He had confused a minor concept with something else. I made up an example where his logic failed, thinking I was having trouble with understanding the material. Commented Oct 27 at 1:51

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First off, don't be too hard on yourself. If the professor does think you are good researcher material, I'd personally take it as a compliment. Also do not think that you are "stupid". We all take different times trying to digest new information, and the fact that you like the topics also suggests that motivation isn't a problem here as well.

From what your description gives off, I think your professor can be reasonable if spoken to directly. He does seem genuinely convinced of your abilities. Maybe he thinks he can "mould" you into a researcher if he is fairly young as well, although this is me speculating. This happens to be the case with a large number of younger teachers and professors, who have a more ideal view of their job. You do mention that he seems very amiable, albeit intimidating.

I think you are making the binary choice in your head. I suggest that you talk with this professor and reason with him. You have good reasons as well. I believe that, given the information you gave, he will oblige you. Supposing he blows up at your face, then cut your losses. You do not want to work in such an environment if all you are asking is more balance to your academic obligations. You do not need to bring up your personal information, even bringing them up here was unneccessary. So long as you present your reasons for the breather, he should accept them.

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  • You're right that he is relatively new to being an educator; while not young, he had spent a few decades in industry. He does seem reasonable, but as long as it is up to his standards. Some of the lab students are 3rd/4th year undergrads, and they manage to come close to meeting his expectations albeit being under a considerable amount of constant pressure. He likes to say "many have come and gone through this lab...," so I'm more concerned with disappointing him and then being at risk of getting kicked out. But I think I will at least bring it up in passing. Really appreciate your insight. Commented Oct 26 at 12:43
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I’m a 1st year undergrad in material sciences and engineering...I found a genuine interest towards mathematics

Part of your challenge is to resolve this dilemma. If you want to pursue the first, then it might be wise to pursue this research opportunity. If you want to pursue math, then this research opportunity is mostly a distraction and you would be better off dropping it and switching your major. If you do not know which you want to do, pursuing the research may be one way to find out, but don't wait too long to make a decision.

2 weeks later got called in for a meeting...I could barely answer his opening question, "Explain this paper to me."...his disappointment was...obvious.

To put it bluntly, I would be disappointed too. First because you had to "get called in" -- you should have scheduled an appointment to ask some questions. And second because once you did get called in, you couldn't answer the easiest possible question.

Now it's perfectly fair to say, I didn't read the papers or schedule an appointment because I'm busy with other things and not that interested in this. If that's the case, you should tell the professor clearly that you will not pursue research. This may burn a bridge, of course, but it's better than wasting everyone's time for a few more months and then burning the bridge.

I just don't know whether I'm stupid or if he has unrealistic expectations for a freshman...Dude is nice but intimidating as hell.

I doubt you are stupid, but research does require a certain amount of time, effort, and initiative. Again, it's perfectly fair to say that you want to focus your time/effort on other things right now. As for the professor: a good litmus test may be to see how he reacts when you schedule the next appointment and ask some questions about the papers. If he is glad you took the initiative and answers your questions kindly, then great; if he is disappointed because he considers your questions too "stupid," then he might not be a good advisor for you.

asking the professor about cutting me some slack for the current semester (which I’m afraid may be a foolish offense).

It's hard to be "half-in/half-out." Undergrads have so little time/knowledge as it is, it's really not worth the effort to mentor one who needs "extra slack" for an entire semester. Now if you had suffered a personal tragedy, fine, of course you would deserve extra slack, but coursework is something that all undergrads struggle with.

He comes off as either way too smart or just has been too long since he himself was an undergrad to understand these miscellaneous struggles. It’s a running joke in the lab that he’s some elite government undercover agent, which explains why he ended up in this mid-tier school.

I recommend avoiding this type of speculation. The skills gap between tenured faculty at top schools and mid-tier schools is likely far less than you imagine. It's possible this guy is a just a jerk, or has poor interpersonal skills, or unrealistic expectations, or many other shortcomings, but these are not necessarily tied to his age or intelligence.

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    1. Math is just an interest, not a passion to purse as a career. 2-4. The papers had technical words, not even full concepts, that I have never seen before. I deemed it unsubstantial to go ask questions as it would be no more than "please explain words that I could search up and study myself". I was worried about being stupid since despite investing the 2 weeks into studying those papers, the end result was looking like not having spent time preparing. 5. This is my fear as well, although I was hoping being a freshman would be enough of an excuse...perhaps not. Thanks for the advice! Commented Oct 27 at 1:38
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    I deemed it unsubstantial to go ask questions as it would be no more than "please explain words that I could search up and study myself" This is a common fallacy. The reality is: You had questions and you were not able to answer them yourself. That is all you need! It does not matter if your problem is missing knowledge or just tools or tipps on how to get it yourself. All that matters is, that you need somebody to point you in the right direction. And there is never shame in that. An added bonus is, that he gets insight into your struggles and can help you in other, unexpected ways. Commented Oct 27 at 13:23
  • I agree. Or to put it another way: after two weeks, you still hadn't really understood the papers. There are only two options: either you had not put in sufficient time/effort, or you had trouble understanding it. In the second case, it is definitely time to check in with the professor; going open-loop for even longer is not the answer. Commented Oct 27 at 15:30
  • @icehock If you don't want to pester him every time you don't understand a word, tell him you're not familiar with a lot of the vocabulary and ask if there's a good glossary or something he can point you at. (First try googling "[field] glossary" along with a couple of the specific words you don't know; that might turn something up.) Commented Oct 27 at 17:09

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